I made another pot of soup. Ivan said, "This soup tastes funny."
What have I done??????
(see 2nd last post)
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
Courage
Ivan had a football game yesterday and beginning early in the day I prayed very specifically for certain things for him and his team. I asked for protection-both physically and emotionally for Ivan and his team mates. I really didn't want to see my boy hurt. I asked for a real courage for Ivan, as he tends to hold back a bit in the play because of his tendency to be shy. Funny that he loves football so much! But I asked God to fill him with courage so that he would experience the satisfaction that comes from taking a risk. And then I boldly asked God, if it was within His will, to give Ivan's team a win. Selfish, I know, but I thought it was OK to humbly ask.
Long story short-as I was driving around a city I don’t live in, looking for the nearest hospital so that Ivan’s wrist could be x-rayed, I had to ask God why he hadn’t answered my prayers. It wasn’t long before God graciously pointed out that He had. Ivan was showing an incredible courage in the face of much pain and in the possibility of his football season coming to an early end. He was protected in the fact that we found an emergency room that was not crowded, and with a doctor who was gentle and caring and thorough. Not what I asked for at all, and yet so much more!
I love my God. I love His faithfulness and provision. I love that I can trust Him to do what is best, even when I ask for and want “easy”.
I have to say though, that it is hard being a Mom of a 13 year old boy! When he was in pain, I wanted nothing more than to hold him on my lap and comfort him, but we are in a stage where we show our love in different ways other than touch (and this with a boy that used to be my constant shadow and “cling-on”). I am totally OK with this stage and with allowing him to grow up and become a man, but oh, how many times I reached out to touch him yesterday, only to stop my hand before I made him feel awkward. I suppose part of letting him grow up and exhibit that very courage I asked for, is to let him deal with his pain in his own way. I know deep inside he was glad I was there and that he needed me, but it’s the outward display of his need that I miss. Maybe Ivan isn’t the only one who needs courage.
As for the other prayer I prayed: Ivan’s team lost. Badly. But I am trusting God in that as well. How could I not?
Long story short-as I was driving around a city I don’t live in, looking for the nearest hospital so that Ivan’s wrist could be x-rayed, I had to ask God why he hadn’t answered my prayers. It wasn’t long before God graciously pointed out that He had. Ivan was showing an incredible courage in the face of much pain and in the possibility of his football season coming to an early end. He was protected in the fact that we found an emergency room that was not crowded, and with a doctor who was gentle and caring and thorough. Not what I asked for at all, and yet so much more!
I love my God. I love His faithfulness and provision. I love that I can trust Him to do what is best, even when I ask for and want “easy”.
I have to say though, that it is hard being a Mom of a 13 year old boy! When he was in pain, I wanted nothing more than to hold him on my lap and comfort him, but we are in a stage where we show our love in different ways other than touch (and this with a boy that used to be my constant shadow and “cling-on”). I am totally OK with this stage and with allowing him to grow up and become a man, but oh, how many times I reached out to touch him yesterday, only to stop my hand before I made him feel awkward. I suppose part of letting him grow up and exhibit that very courage I asked for, is to let him deal with his pain in his own way. I know deep inside he was glad I was there and that he needed me, but it’s the outward display of his need that I miss. Maybe Ivan isn’t the only one who needs courage.
As for the other prayer I prayed: Ivan’s team lost. Badly. But I am trusting God in that as well. How could I not?
Friday, September 19, 2008
What Have I Done?
I am sitting here and wondering if I've made a terrible mistake, one that will haunt me for the rest of my years. One that impacts my family and their well being.
You see, I sold Bob's grandmother's soup pot. I know you're thinking, "That's it? THAT's the big confession? So what?" Or maybe you're thinking, "You did what? How could you?" Either way, I understand.
For the first years of our marriage, I tried valiantly to fulfill my Mennonite woman role as a homemaker, which of course, involves the making of delicious soup-without a recipe! I failed though, until the fateful day I inherited the soup pot of Bob's dear grandmother, who raised 17 (yes-17) children and, I'm thinking, made a lot of soup! What was interesting to note was that right after I inherited the pot, I began to make very good soup. We always jokingly said that the ability came with the soup pot. At least I thought it was a joke.
Bob and I are in the process of weeding things out of our life and home that bog us down and hold us back. Over the last few weeks we have emptied many closets and cupboards of things we've held on to over the years (truly amazing. I recommend it) and which we really don't need any longer. When I got to the cupboard with my pots I realized that I never use The Soup Pot any more, since I have 3 very nice, new large pots that I use in its stead. So I made the difficult decision to let it go.
I SOLD IT FOR 50 CENTS! To a gentleman who was going to use it for the aluminum. Again, Bob and I joked that there went my soup making ability. At least I thought it was a joke.
The other night I made a pot of chicken soup, my daughter's favorite. Except she doesn't like this batch. She says "It stinks". I didn't think anything of it until today, when I mentioned it to Bob, he replied "YOU SOLD THE POT!" (A statement that taken out of context, would be disturbing.)
Anyway, that leads me here, to a place of seller's remorse and dismay. Will I ever make good soup again?
I want my Soup Pot back......
You see, I sold Bob's grandmother's soup pot. I know you're thinking, "That's it? THAT's the big confession? So what?" Or maybe you're thinking, "You did what? How could you?" Either way, I understand.
For the first years of our marriage, I tried valiantly to fulfill my Mennonite woman role as a homemaker, which of course, involves the making of delicious soup-without a recipe! I failed though, until the fateful day I inherited the soup pot of Bob's dear grandmother, who raised 17 (yes-17) children and, I'm thinking, made a lot of soup! What was interesting to note was that right after I inherited the pot, I began to make very good soup. We always jokingly said that the ability came with the soup pot. At least I thought it was a joke.
Bob and I are in the process of weeding things out of our life and home that bog us down and hold us back. Over the last few weeks we have emptied many closets and cupboards of things we've held on to over the years (truly amazing. I recommend it) and which we really don't need any longer. When I got to the cupboard with my pots I realized that I never use The Soup Pot any more, since I have 3 very nice, new large pots that I use in its stead. So I made the difficult decision to let it go.
I SOLD IT FOR 50 CENTS! To a gentleman who was going to use it for the aluminum. Again, Bob and I joked that there went my soup making ability. At least I thought it was a joke.
The other night I made a pot of chicken soup, my daughter's favorite. Except she doesn't like this batch. She says "It stinks". I didn't think anything of it until today, when I mentioned it to Bob, he replied "YOU SOLD THE POT!" (A statement that taken out of context, would be disturbing.)
Anyway, that leads me here, to a place of seller's remorse and dismay. Will I ever make good soup again?
I want my Soup Pot back......
Friday, August 15, 2008
New Look
Isn't this new look to my blog just too cute? Oh wait-that's the name of the site that I got the template from. Good name!
Anyway, it's a sign of progress if someone like me can actually pull off changing her blog page by herself. Not my gift, but I did it anyway!
If anyone still reads this blog, you may have noticed that it's been quiet here for at least a week. It seems that my head only has room for so and so much, and these days that room is full of plans for our church's VBS. A friend and I are co-directing it and while it's a lot of fun, it is a lot of mental work. So, no mental energy to take the time to sit down and write. VBS is over in 2 weeks, so stay tuned. I have a few ideas rattling around in my brain-things I'd like to write out and share.
Until then-enjoy some of these last beautiful weeks of summer!
Anyway, it's a sign of progress if someone like me can actually pull off changing her blog page by herself. Not my gift, but I did it anyway!
If anyone still reads this blog, you may have noticed that it's been quiet here for at least a week. It seems that my head only has room for so and so much, and these days that room is full of plans for our church's VBS. A friend and I are co-directing it and while it's a lot of fun, it is a lot of mental work. So, no mental energy to take the time to sit down and write. VBS is over in 2 weeks, so stay tuned. I have a few ideas rattling around in my brain-things I'd like to write out and share.
Until then-enjoy some of these last beautiful weeks of summer!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Listening
I have a new pet peeve.
Or maybe it's not new, I've just run into it so many times in the last week or two that I have to vent about it. Whatever the case, you get to hear about it now.
I am frustrated with people who act like they are listening to you , but really aren't. Worse, they ask you a question and then never really listen to your answer. Why did you ask me, if you didn't care about the answer?
Plus, I have run into people who act like they are listening to me when I am voicing a concern or frustration, and then jump in when I am done and basically tell me that I shouldn't let it bother me. I know very well that I can't let small frustrations take over and get me down, and try not to do that, but sometimes, when you think it's safe, you want to share a bit of what you are dealing with. I guess it's not always safe.
Sometimes, you don't need an answer, you need a listening ear and understanding.
And then, after I vent this, I have to ask myself how often I have done these very things. And I have to face that I have probably done it, especially to my children, more times than I want to admit to. So, let it be known here that I will try to LISTEN to my kids (and friends) and let them voice their fears, concerns, frustrations, etc. without offering a quick answer.
Listening can be hard! Jumping in and fixing things or trying to make the problem go away is so tempting. May I learn to be patient and allow my loved ones the freedom and space to work through things on their own and a safe place to do that. And, to value them enough to give them my full attention when they are telling me what's on their mind.
Or maybe it's not new, I've just run into it so many times in the last week or two that I have to vent about it. Whatever the case, you get to hear about it now.
I am frustrated with people who act like they are listening to you , but really aren't. Worse, they ask you a question and then never really listen to your answer. Why did you ask me, if you didn't care about the answer?
Plus, I have run into people who act like they are listening to me when I am voicing a concern or frustration, and then jump in when I am done and basically tell me that I shouldn't let it bother me. I know very well that I can't let small frustrations take over and get me down, and try not to do that, but sometimes, when you think it's safe, you want to share a bit of what you are dealing with. I guess it's not always safe.
Sometimes, you don't need an answer, you need a listening ear and understanding.
And then, after I vent this, I have to ask myself how often I have done these very things. And I have to face that I have probably done it, especially to my children, more times than I want to admit to. So, let it be known here that I will try to LISTEN to my kids (and friends) and let them voice their fears, concerns, frustrations, etc. without offering a quick answer.
Listening can be hard! Jumping in and fixing things or trying to make the problem go away is so tempting. May I learn to be patient and allow my loved ones the freedom and space to work through things on their own and a safe place to do that. And, to value them enough to give them my full attention when they are telling me what's on their mind.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Look what the wind blew in....
Bob and I had such fun last night, surprising Emilie with something she's wanted for a long time. She's assured us many times over the last couple of years that if only she had a trampoline, she would spend ALL her time outside. The budget didn't allow this incentive to spend time in the great outdoors, though, until this week when friends offered theirs to us at a price we couldn't pass up. So Bob arranged that they would drop it off secretly last night to a spot on the yard that Emilie couldn't see from inside, and later, when Emilie was getting ready for bed, he set it up in the back yard.
What fun to wait for her to find it this morning! A thunderstorm rolled through during the night and I think for just a split second this morning I had her convinced that the wind had blown it onto our yard.
Anyway, just had to share a great moment for us. I love it when we can do something unexpected for the kids.
(I'd have a picture, but our camera is on holiday in Yellowknife at the moment).
What fun to wait for her to find it this morning! A thunderstorm rolled through during the night and I think for just a split second this morning I had her convinced that the wind had blown it onto our yard.
Anyway, just had to share a great moment for us. I love it when we can do something unexpected for the kids.
(I'd have a picture, but our camera is on holiday in Yellowknife at the moment).
Monday, July 28, 2008
Diary of a 42 year old Jogger
6 am: The alarm is going off already????? It's too early! Hit the snooze button!
6:30 am: Well, I guess I should get up and get out there for my run. Maybe in a few more minutes...
6:40 am: OK OK , I'm going. If I don't go soon it will be too warm.
6:50 am: If bending over to put my shoes on is this hard, what will a run be like?
6:52 am: Hmm, beautiful morning. Glad I'm out here.
6:53 am: Good start to my run, I'm feeling not too bad.
1/2 mile: Yikes-those leg muscles are complaining already? I've only just started! How will I keep going further than even a mile? Maybe I'll keep it short today. Take it easy on myself.
3/4 mile: This is hard! How did I do 3 1/2 miles two days ago? I must be crazy to think I could do this again!
1 mile: Well, I made it at least a mile. I've got to hit that "groove" soon, right? It'll get easier, right?
1 1/4 miles: A short run wouldn't be too bad-after all, I'm only disappointing myself. My loss. (Or not, in the case of weight. I guess I'll keep going!)
1 1/2 miles: Is fitness really all it's cracked up to be? I mean really-is something this hard really that good for us? I could be at home enjoying the morning on my deck with a cup of coffee-no pain involved.
2 miles: I made 2! Not too bad. I guess I'll go for 3.
2 1/4 miles: It's getting a bit easier. Maybe I'll go for 3 1/2 and at least match my last run.
2 1/2 miles: A mother deer and her fawn! How absolutely gorgeous! Thank You Lord, for encouragement when I needed it! I think I can keep going.
3 miles: Well, I made it this far. I think I can do another 1/2 mile...
3 1/2 miles: You know what-I'm going for all 4! I haven't run 4 for years, but I think I can do it today!
3 3/4 miles: Is that the Rocky theme song I hear??
4 miles: I did it! I did it! Whew-that was hard, but so worth it!
And there you have it-a small peak into my mind as I struggle down the road. Every single morning that I'm out there I am reminded of the parallel between running and my spiritual life. This "diary" could easily be my thoughts as I go through my spiritual walk. Stepping out of safety and comfort to be challenged and to gain strength is difficult. I do it, but I generally hit that "wall" of pain and discouragement, not too mention weariness. There are moments of wondering if I wouldn't be better off back in my comfort zone. There are moments of rationalizing going back and quitting. And then, come moments of satisfaction and even of direct encouragement from God. They couldn't be from anyone else, so I keep going. And before I know it, I have gone farther than I've ever gone before. The joy in that moment is exhilarating and though it doesn't erase the pain and struggle that were a part of the journey, it makes it all worth while.
"And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith." Hebrews 12:1b-2a.
6:30 am: Well, I guess I should get up and get out there for my run. Maybe in a few more minutes...
6:40 am: OK OK , I'm going. If I don't go soon it will be too warm.
6:50 am: If bending over to put my shoes on is this hard, what will a run be like?
6:52 am: Hmm, beautiful morning. Glad I'm out here.
6:53 am: Good start to my run, I'm feeling not too bad.
1/2 mile: Yikes-those leg muscles are complaining already? I've only just started! How will I keep going further than even a mile? Maybe I'll keep it short today. Take it easy on myself.
3/4 mile: This is hard! How did I do 3 1/2 miles two days ago? I must be crazy to think I could do this again!
1 mile: Well, I made it at least a mile. I've got to hit that "groove" soon, right? It'll get easier, right?
1 1/4 miles: A short run wouldn't be too bad-after all, I'm only disappointing myself. My loss. (Or not, in the case of weight. I guess I'll keep going!)
1 1/2 miles: Is fitness really all it's cracked up to be? I mean really-is something this hard really that good for us? I could be at home enjoying the morning on my deck with a cup of coffee-no pain involved.
2 miles: I made 2! Not too bad. I guess I'll go for 3.
2 1/4 miles: It's getting a bit easier. Maybe I'll go for 3 1/2 and at least match my last run.
2 1/2 miles: A mother deer and her fawn! How absolutely gorgeous! Thank You Lord, for encouragement when I needed it! I think I can keep going.
3 miles: Well, I made it this far. I think I can do another 1/2 mile...
3 1/2 miles: You know what-I'm going for all 4! I haven't run 4 for years, but I think I can do it today!
3 3/4 miles: Is that the Rocky theme song I hear??
4 miles: I did it! I did it! Whew-that was hard, but so worth it!
And there you have it-a small peak into my mind as I struggle down the road. Every single morning that I'm out there I am reminded of the parallel between running and my spiritual life. This "diary" could easily be my thoughts as I go through my spiritual walk. Stepping out of safety and comfort to be challenged and to gain strength is difficult. I do it, but I generally hit that "wall" of pain and discouragement, not too mention weariness. There are moments of wondering if I wouldn't be better off back in my comfort zone. There are moments of rationalizing going back and quitting. And then, come moments of satisfaction and even of direct encouragement from God. They couldn't be from anyone else, so I keep going. And before I know it, I have gone farther than I've ever gone before. The joy in that moment is exhilarating and though it doesn't erase the pain and struggle that were a part of the journey, it makes it all worth while.
"And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith." Hebrews 12:1b-2a.
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